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The Start of a New Chapter

Writer's picture: Gierla CamilleGierla Camille

Recently, my daughter talked with her dad and shared that she had second thoughts about pursuing law. She said, "I'm thinking of becoming an entrepreneur and making my mom's dream a reality because I believe she has a really good product, and I don't understand why she's not pursuing it."



Although it made me smile for a second, it instantly made me sad.


While pursuing my degree and figuring out what I truly want in life, I haven't included her in my thought process and how the changes may have impacted her vision of me.


After completing my first cookbook, I got to sit with the many emotions that came with the significant milestone. My cookbook was a project my mother and I discussed doing together, and her passing made me want to complete it sooner so that my family could continue sharing her memories through meals. During that journey, I discovered a lot about my mother and myself. I recalled many good and bad memories and felt a weight was lifted. Like Z, the drive to open a restaurant for me was fueled by wanting to fulfill my mother's dream. From the time I was a little girl, she always dreamt about opening up a Haitian restaurant and being able to feed people. She always talked about her lack of education being in the way of her being able to rent a place and get the necessary licenses to run it on her own. As I became an adult and in my quest to give her everything she wanted, I picked up the dream of opening up a restaurant. When she passed, and I started cooking more and more of her dishes, I also found myself wanting a restaurant.



Running a restaurant is a lot of work. I've never been afraid of hard work, but I have reached a place where I enjoy having more control over what I do and don't. I enjoy working in the corporate landscape because I have a set schedule, income, and the ability to move up the ladder when I want. I enjoyed times when I got to be a leader and manager and guide those on my team. My lifestyle as a military spouse isn't conducive to starting a restaurant business when I move almost every 3 years. Statistically, the success rate for new restaurants is low, and in the first 5 years, you are typically breaking even or barely making a profit. When I think of my post-military life, I don't want to work as much as it will require to run a successful restaurant. The times needed to run a restaurant business exceed your typical 8-hour shift. You work long hours, including evenings, weekends, and holidays. I've come to enjoy the serenity of being off in the evenings and weekends and being more present as a wife and mother. My job allows me the ability to have a work-life balance.


Lastly, I love cooking and entertaining. I love the power of a good meal, where you can bring people together for a moment, creating an escape from whatever else they have going on in their lives. I don't want to lose that passion. At the root of my mother's purpose was her love for people and understanding of the unique ability and comfort a good meal could bring. It's why her kitchen was always open to anyone—even the drug dealers and homeless roaming the street. I didn't get it as a kid, but she created a moment of solace and peace for those who needed it most.

The minute cooking becomes the means by which I earn my livelihood, it becomes a duty and a job, bringing a level of stress and anxiety of its own.


I never want to lose my love and passion for cooking and entertaining. I never want the most profound connection I remember with my mother to become something I feel enslaved to.




I haven't lost my entrepreneurial spirit or given up on my dreams related to food and my mom's legacy. I have transformed that vision into something I genuinely want versus feeling obligated to fulfill her dream.


Being given the honor of being a mother was a blessing. Although I didn't care what the sex of the baby would be, I was thrilled when I found out it was a girl. When I left home, I started on a journey filled with setting an example my nieces could follow, and that purpose became more prominent when I now had a daughter.


Reflecting on my daughter's statement over the past few weeks, I realized the power of love and influence. The same love that compelled me to want to see my mom's dreams through is now what is driving her to want to open up a restaurant.


I never want my child to live a life trying to fulfill my dreams. The reason I do what I do, the lifestyle, the best school systems, extracurricular activities, traveling the world, and exposure to different cultures and cuisines, is to expand her options. It's all to expand the possibilities in life and allow her the opportunity to dream big and want things beyond my wants and aspirations.


So, where others see a thoughtful and loving comment in a way, I failed. I failed to realize the power of imagery and action to kids. Kids don't hold on to what you say as much as they hold on to what you do. To her knowledge, I dreamed about owning my restaurant, but I haven't done so. The nights I create a menu and open a restaurant at home to make family dinner fun have also given her the impression that I'm settling instead of making my dream a reality.


So, I say all of that to say that now that my school workload has dropped significantly and I'm almost at the finish line, I will use that time more to create deeper connections with my daughter and allow her to see that I am living the life I truly want. I am accomplishing all my wants and dreams, and I want her to live a life where her own goals and dreams fuel her drive.


When my goals and dreams changed, I failed to communicate those changes and share the new plan with her.


I want to continue to cook and entertain but on my terms. I plan to reopen my catering services and offer limited party packages based on my schedule and availability that don't restrict me from truly enjoying life. A few people have reached out about private chef dinner date nights and family cooking sessions, and I will start offering those this summer after I graduate.


Zolanie has always had a way of making me take a step back and reflect on my life. Because of her outgoing spirit, I constantly challenge myself to be a woman she can look up to. It's important to me that she sees her mom thriving and not just surviving this thing called life. I want her to know the power of hard work and know she can accomplish her goals and dreams.


As my 39th birthday approaches next month, I'm no longer waiting to pursue some of my passions until this military spouse journey ends. I may not be opening a brick-and-mortar restaurant, but I have always wanted to do pop-up restaurant events where I create a themed dinner with some of my favorite dishes worldwide. Each event will have a tailored menu, and I'll offer tickets to those who want to join me on this journey.


I want to introduce you to Chopping it up with Gierla: Chefs Table. More details on next month's kick-off event are coming soon.

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